Saturday, November 23, 2013

"Never Alone We Go"


On a winding road I go.
Dark and cold is this road.
The shadows grow and the whipping wind whistles,
Which way should I go?
Straight and narrow road I go.
Peace and love fill my soul.
No path is easy, no path is clear.
Crack and bend under pressure I fear.
Follow the brightness, let the happiness guide each step.
Whispers of encouragement
breathed so gently never holding us back.
Love and spirit fill those cracks,
 making us stronger, giving us strength to fight back.
Never alone on this road you go. 
On this road, we call life, never alone we go.

- Myself, Brianne (:



The Tell-Tale Heart

If you're a fan of poetry, stories, Edgar Allan Poe, or Mr. Matthew Gubler you should take a few minutes to listen to this!! Matthew does a reading of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Tell-Tale Heart." It's AMAZING! Seriously.



https://soundcloud.com/matthewgraygubler/the-tell-tale-heart-by-edgar

Friday, November 22, 2013

Doctors, Dragons and Life

It's been an interesting week for me.  After weeks of being exhausted and just not feeling well I finally made an appointment to see my doctor. I assumed I had a little cold and was just feeling extra lazy about homework, but to my surprise my O2 sats were really low and my PFT's were, in the words of my doctor, terrible! Since I wasn't feeling as terrible as my numbers were we decided to give oral antibiotics 10 days to get my numbers up before turning to IV's. My sinus CT was also apparently a disaster, because my CF doctor called my ENT to move, my already scheduled, appointment up a few weeks. 

So despite feeling like poo, being exhausted and having dumb sinus headaches I've been out and about as usual. I HATE spending time in resting because of CF. It's not something I do easily. I've been extremely blessed this semester to not have needed any antibiotics, actually I've made it 5 MONTHS without antibiotics!! Even now being so sick I've managed to get A's on everything! This last week was a rough one though. I'll never get use to seeing such low numbers when I'm sick, so on top of that, being so tired, and being discouraged by how easily I was out of breath I was in some serious need of cheering up. Lucky for me that was gonna happen all week long! I had two people tell me, after talking about my current health state, that I hide being sick so well. Sounds like a silly compliment, but for anyone who has CF or any other person who spends a lot of time sick, this is a wonderful compliment!! I was told by a friend, the day I had my doctors appointment, he had no clue I had been feeling so sick, cause I had seemed so happy and well the week before. I had my bishop tell me he was so impressed with how well I manage having a life and having CF at the same time, and that if I had never said anything he would have never known I had CF to begin with. This just made my week!! I will always talk about my CF. I want people to be aware, I want people to feel comfortable asking questions about it, but I also hope the more they learn the more they understand when I'm to tired to go out or cancel on them it's not cause I want to it's cause of my CF. However, I will never ever let CF define me! I won't let my illness become who I am. Sure I may have a down day after a not so great doctors appointment, and I realize I need to take some time to myself, but I will bounce right back from that. I will continue to be happy, I will continue to live my life and pursue my dreams. I will push the limits and have some fun! Having conversations like I had this week just go to show I'm doing a wonderful job at not letting CF run my life.

The other day on Criminal Minds there was a quote that's been on my mind all week:

"Fairytales don't tell children that dragons exist; children already 
know they exist. Fairytales tell children that dragons can be killed." 

I feel in love with this quote the moment I heard it, how true that is. We already know there are dragons in life, but as we work hard, rely on Christ, our family and friends we quickly see that those dragons can be killed. How grateful I am for that!

While times may get tough, I have these wonderful and beautiful people in my life to get me through life and help fight the dragons. How I ever got so lucky I don't know, but I sure am counting my blessings! (: These are all pictures from my last 5 months of no antibiotics and healthy fun living!