The me everyone else sees... IV time again!

Have you ever noticed how one of our hardest critiques is ourselves? It really hit me on Sunday while I was talking to a member of the bishopric in our singles ward that I see more faults in myself then others see in me. So often I get caught up in my own thoughts or over analyzing everything in life that I don't see the person everyone around me sees. I have friends and family tell me how wonderful I am in different things all the time, but it took someone outside of that close group to really open my eyes to my true potential. Both my bishop and one of his counselors have mentioned to me how they've noticed how great I am at making friends, including others and my great outlook on life. My new goal is to become the me I want to be, the me that everyone else sees. I need to let things go and not over think things. I need to be myself, and put myself out there to make friends and make sure everyone is included in activities. I feel like I have so much more in life to learn and so much more room to grow! I'm really excited to work on this!! I feel like my calling as a teacher every Monday has already helped me in being more outgoing. Getting up in front of everyone to teach church topics, when I feel others would be so much more qualified, was such a challenge, but each week I teach it gets easier and easier. So who do you see in the mirror? Do you see the great qualities in yourself that those who love you see?!

On another note I went to the doctors today for a sick visit. My PFT's (which for those that don't know is my lung function) dropped 14% so I'm starting a month of IV's and some orals to kick whatever this is in the butt. I'm soooo ready to stop feeling like poo and get back to my normal self and back into school business. I'm all hooked up and ready to kick some CF butt!!

Home means Nevada....

I got to spend my last week of summer break in my favorite part of my home state.... the biggest little city, Reno! We had so much FUN going to Tahoe, riding the rapids of the Truckee River, having lunch in Loyalton, Partying at the Wall, staying up late laughing and talking, margaritas and wiffle ball... yes those two go together, and doing what we do best.... being ridiculous! My life wouldn't be complete with out these girls, my best friends!! I can be my weird self around  them and for some reason they still like me hahah here's some pictures from my wonderful trip up north (:

Our FINALLY ready and going to party mirror picture!

Photo Bombed (:

Beeest Fraaaand!!!

We finally made it past the waves out to the cold water!

Riding the rapids of the Truckee downtown with my Wifey!

We ran into Jon while down at the Truckee!
So glad he's home  and safe after a year deployment.

Yup, I love these girls more then you'd ever know!

Goodbye Summer!

Why hello stranger! It's been awhile since I've posted anything, but I take that as a good sign. I had a very healthy busy, very FUN last half of my summer break. It was full of family time, a Make A Wish trip to Florida, and a trip to see my best friends in Reno! I thought I'd share some pictures from our amazing trip to Orlando, it was our big family trip of the year, and Corntey's Make A Wish! We spent a week (which wasn't nearly enough time) in a Disney Resort. We did 4 Disney World Parks and both Universal Studio's parks. We might of been exhausted and sore, and I was definetly a grouch a lot of the time because of it, but in the end it was the most amazing trip I've ever been on!! I'd like to share some of that fun with the blog world (:

Tigger will ALWAYS been my favorite!

Dinsey's Hollywood Studios

Headed to the airport bright early the day we left vegas.

Eating dinner in Germany at Epcot!
Serisouly the best night of food ALL week.  I even had a sausage salad!

Butter Beeer!

HOGWARTS!!!!!!

Captain America was such a charmer!

Cocoa Beach! Our first ever trip to the Atlantic 

TOY SOLDIER!!!

The beach at our resort across the lake from the Magical Kingdom!

Photo Booth Fun!

At my cousin Dulcie's wedding her and her husband had the amazing idea of having a photo booth with lots of fun little props! It was a huge hit the entire evening, we had so much fun goofing around in there. Dulcie sent out emails with a bunch of the pictures we took, and I thought I'd share the fun and goofiness! Marler's sure know how to act goofy and have a good time (:

Grandpa and the girls!!
Who knew Grandpa could do such a great kissy face! I love him.

Goofy picture with the girls and the bride!!

My wonderful, amazing goofy family!

The beautiful bride with her cousins!

Finding the Blessings

At church I teach the FHE (family home evening) lessons in our singles ward on Monday nights, and my turn to teach is coming up. So in the back of my head while at church on Sunday I knew I needed to decide what I was going to give my lesson on. During the first hour of church (sacrament) as I was reading from Isiah I came across something near and dear to me that I keep in my scriptures, a copy of my cousin Jason's testimony, and I decided to pull it out and read it. (I've talked about my cousin before on here, he passed away from cancer when I was young, and I've always looked up to him in so many ways.) Several times Jason mentioned how blessed his life was, and how full of joy and happiness his life has been. He talked about how grateful he was to be a tool in the Lord's hands and how grateful he was to have had opportunities to share the gospel to others. This really stuck with me as I went through the next 2 hours of church. Every time I read through it I found myself amazed at how someone who had been battling cancer for years and knew they were at the end of their life could be so full of happiness and joy, and could recognize all the countless blessings that were in his life. As I thought more about this I began to think how much joy do I find filling up my days? Can I see all the blessings I have in my life, even through all the trials that may be clouding my path? I realized that I don't take nearly enough time to express my gratitude and not enough time is spend focusing on the happiness and joy in life. Every problem and trial in our life is placed before for a reason. Our trials help shape us into stronger people. They teach us those things we need to know and learn before it's our time to leave this earth. In a world full of problems why not focus on the positive?! 

By the end of church I knew what I was going to be teaching in my next class. Finding the blessings in our life and in our trials... having an attitude of gratitude! I found a beautiful Mormon Message called "In the Spirit of Thanksgiving" that fit perfect with this topic that I posted just below this. I also came across a talk given by President Monson's from a recent general conference about gratitude. 

In the talk by President Monson he said:

"This is a wonderful time to be on earth. While there is much that is wrong in the world today, there are many things that are right and good. There are marriages that make it, parents who love their children and sacrifice for them, friends who care about us and help us, teachers who teach. Our lives are blessed in countless ways. We can lift ourselves and others as well when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues. Someone has said that “gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others"

 Life is to short to dwell on everything that is going wrong in life. Some days it may be easy to see all the blessings, while others days it may seem impossible! President Eyring encouraged us to kneel down in prayer and ask for help in seeing those blessings clearly when trials and hardships make them hard to see. I know that as we focus on the beauty in life and all the we've been given, our problems won't seems quit as heavy. Of course it won't be easy, but nothing in life is really easy... well except maybe sitting on the couch watching your favorite tv show, but that's besides the point (:

Pro's n Con's of CF

So I haven't done a single one of these days since I started so for the last few days of May I'm going to pick and choose a few of my favorites to do. Today I chose the Pro's n Con's! I know what you're thinking how can there be any pro's to living with a chronic illness?! Guess what, there totally are! If I live life only thinking of the negative I'd be quit the bitter person.

Pro's: 

1. The first that comes to mind is FOOD! I can eat whatever I want whenever I want. Actually it's encouraged. Salty, sweet, full of carbs... I can eat it! I don't have to worry about my metabolism slowing as I get older. My body burns so much trying to breathe so eating is what I do best (:

2. The CF community! I've met some of the most amazing people through the online CF community. Some of my best friends are people I've never actually met. Often it's CF that initially connects us, but is so many other "normal" things that keep us connected and being friends. I hope one day I'm able to meet these amazing, inspiring and incredibly beautiful people in person. They help keep my spirits up, and are there when things get rough. They've been where I am and know how to help.

3. Another would be life experiences and who I've become. There's a certain amount of resposiblity that comes with having CF. I've always needed to be able to keep up with school and friends while finding time to get all my treatments, IV's and doctors appointments taken care of as well. When I went off to college it really was all up to me to keep up with everything. I couldn't be like every other freshman in college. I learned how to manage my time very early one. My health depended on it. I also think CF as helped me become a goal oriented and positive person, I've had to work hard for so many things in my life, and without setting goals and having the positive attitude that nothing is going to hold me back, I think I would of given up a long time ago. Even when things get hard and I'm frustrated I know that tomorrow is a new day, and with hard work things will get better. I have my eye on the prize and I work hard to get it.

4. I feel that I also appreciate my days more then a normal 21 year old would. I don't know how many tomorrow's I'll be blessed with. I don't know how long my lungs will hold out or how long I'll be able to go with out needing oxygen when I'm out and about. I cherish those good friends in my life, and I spend as much time with family as possible. I've been so blessed with the people in my life and I've been blessed with enough health to spend time with them and to be able to attend school full time. I don't let a single day go to waste.

Con's: I don't know if I need to really talk about these. I think they're kind of obvious. I spend hours a day doing treatment. Weeks a year in the hospital, and hours hooked up to IV's. All to often I'm exhausted just from breathing and have to cancel plans with friends. I know that the likely hood that I'll live a normal life span is very slim. I know that one day I'll need a new pair of lungs, or that I'll end up with diabetes. I have to wake up early or miss things with friends for hour long doctors appointments and we spend houndreds of dollars every month on antibiotics. I could probably go own but I'll stop there.

While there seems to be many more con's then pro's what kind of life would I live if I let those con's run my life or weigh down on my mind? Life is better when you wear a smile and have the brightest hope for your future. So cherish today, hold close your loved ones and make plans for a wonderful future not matter what might really lie ahead.

The Biggest Little City

I'm sure ya'll know that I went to school up in Reno at the University of Nevada for two years and a little over a year ago, because of declining health, I had to withdraw from school and move home. It was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make. I hated having to leave my friends, the true Nevada university and the city that I loved. Well this past week I finally made it up Reno to visit after being gone for over a year!! My best friend and I planned a trip for me to be there right after school was over to celebrate making it through the school year. It felt so great to be back in Reno and northern Nevada. It felt so natural to be back on campus and with my friends. I feel so blessed to have such amazing people in my life. I know the girls felt bad that they had to work so much while I was there, but honestly I couldn't of asked for a better trip. We had grilled tri tip and sat by the fire in Loyalton, CA. Movie date with Jacie, TONS of froyo at yogurt beach, deep fried deliciousness for lunch in cow town Loyalton, Keva Juice on campus, thee funnest motorcycle rides with Quinn around town, playing just dance, making new friends, and just flat out being with my best friends! I'm one  lucky girl. I already have my tickets bought for my trip up there in August before school starts again, wohoo!

Sitting by the fire in Loyalton, CA. Such a perfect night!

Getting all geared up to go riding.

Off to ride around town with Quinn!
One of the funnest things I've EVER done!

The view from Lorin's parent's porch in Loyalton.
My favorite little cow town!

Yummy deep fried deliciousness from Frosty's

FROYO at Yogurt Beach (:

So proud of Wolfie for winning mascot of the year!!!

Once Nevada, always Nevada!!